One of Skeezie's frooty frootbat frends, Luxor, sent him a berthday pakije with lots of grate treets in it. Since I'm the smartest cat in the howse, I figyured owt how to brake into the box and eet the skrumshus treets. This is a moovey of that. (Thanks, Luxor!!!)

Can't see it? CLIK HEER to go direktly to the moovey on youtube.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/one-of-skeezies-frooty-frootbat-frends.html

I'm in the doghowse and I'm grownded. At nite, I git let owt of the howse to do my bizniss becuz I don't like using a litter box that the wite rat's bin neer becuz he REEKS and thare's like Hershey's Choklit Surup poop EVRYWARE. So last nite I wint owt, and wile I was at it, I desided to go on walkabowt. In other werds, I got a littul lost. I stayed owt all nite. It was grate. It was a nice nite, and I didn't have the wite rat anyware neer me. I was free free free like the mitey lion. But win it got lite owt in the morning, I didn't know ixaktly ware I was. And I was gitting kinda hungry. Abowt lunchtime, I herd the food man wisseling for me. I have bin traynd to come win he wissels. So I did. I was many many howses away frum owr howse. He apeered to be very happy to see me. He called the food lady on the black box on his desk. She was happy and then she sed I was so grownded. She sownded mad. I can't figyur owt why she'd be mad to see me win I came home. Now I am lokt in the howse with the wite rat for the rest of my life.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/im-in-doghowse-and-im-grownded.html

So the wite rat has bin posting fotos of me in imbarrussing pozishuns, and I'm pritty shoor they've bin dokterd up becuz I don't recall any of thoze fotos ever being taken. Like this one. Wood ANY cat in his rite mind EVER stik his noze within 50 yards of the wite rat's poophole? I think not. I'm gonna look into leegul akshun.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/so-wite-rat-has-bin-posting-fotos-of.html

Heer's a cat hoo is on the forefrunt of cat dominayshun of the werld. Yoo weenie scaredey-cats out thare: take notes!

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/heers-cat-hoo-is-on-forefrunt-of-cat.html

See ware the wite rat's hind leg is? This no dowt meens that he's tuching me with sum of his private parts. Oh, the indignity.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/see-ware-wite-rats-hind-leg-is-this-no.html

Evry day, the man in the bloo shorts or the kyoot guy in the brown shorts brings more presints to the wite rat. It was kind of tikking me off. Until I discuverd thare was stuff in thare for ME, too! Like Rosie and Cheeto got me sum mice that had bin marinated in very very strong catnip. One wiff and I wint nuts and started playing with the wite rat. It almost makes up for Rosie and Cheeto inventing the hole Maobutt thing. And Bravely Sir Robin gave me and Rocky sum mice stuft with catnip that were even stronger than that. So I gess it's okay that the wite rat keeps gitting presints if thare's stuff in thare for me. And for Rocky, too. Rocky had to go to the ER place this weekend and he's bin feeling pritty krappy, so I'm glad the catnip makes him feel better. But, jeez, yoo woodn't beleeve all the sissy outfits that the wite rat got! Even the stuff that wuzn't pink had bling on it, like the shert that Cairo sent him wich was a nice blak color, but wuz studded with dimunds that spelld out "Rockstar." Puhleeze.

And he got 2 pink fether boas, with he refyoozed to take off. Look at this pikchur, wich was taken at his berthday party. Whut a sissy boy!

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/evry-day-man-in-bloo-shorts-or-kyoot.html

Life is good. Altho the wite rat is driving me nuts abowt his berthday, Rocky has bin staying in the howse at nite, wich makes the peeple happy, and as an added bonus, he gits to babysit the wite rat in the cat bedroom so that I can sleep in the ladey's armpit, wich is MY SPOT! Last nite I was so happy and was purring so much that I droold all over the cuvvers on the bed. THANK YOO, ROCKY!!!!

And, only one day to go before the wite rat's berthday, wich will meen in a littul over 24 howrs I'll git sum peese and qwiet at last. I have to be the DeeJay, but that's fine. Rocky will line me up with a cuppul dime bags of nip to get me thru the afternoon.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/life-is-good.html

So, the stoopid wite rat has a box full of berthday gifts, and it reeks of nip, so I broke into it and did sum investigating. Boy, did the wite rat ever git upset abowt that! Yoo can see his pointy littul wite rat noze in the lower rite corner. At ferst, he didn't mind me helping him git a peek at his loot. But then, win I kinda got karried away and started trying to open up the pakijes, he kinda freeked. He is such a panty-waist sissy. THen the Food Lady cot me, and I was busted, and blah blah blah. I know she won't ground me becuz I have to be the DJ at the wite rat's berthday party. It's sort of like having imyoonity.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/so-stoopid-wite-rat-has-box-full-of.html

OK, heer's the Gutter Cat update. The food guy brot Rocky bak home last nite. Rocky was in a bad mood and very hungrey win he got home. He didn't know whut happend ixcept that his gums hert. The wite rat sed he overherd the peeple talking abowt Rocky and that they were happy he didn't have CRF wich has sumthing to do with the kid me diseeze. I don't know whut that is. What he duz have is the same problem with his thigh roids, wich we think is like ham roids, only on the legs. We'll try to do sum more reeserch on that.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/ok-heers-gutter-cat-update.html

This morning, the lady took Rocky away in the bloo masheen in a cardbord box. That duzn't look good. She also didn't feed him brekfist this morning, even tho he was crying that he was starving. Rocky slept inside last nite agin -- and since he was thare to keep the wite rat company, I got to sleep with the Lady all to myself. That made me purr reeely reeely lowd. Just like the old days. I hope Rocky comes back. He's my bud.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/this-morning-lady-took-rocky-away-in.html

This is a stoopid dawg driving a car. I don't see why I can't drive a car (ixcept maybe for the part ware I cannot stand to be inside of one and skreem my lungs owt win they make me go for a ride). If I cood drive, I'd run away frum home this week so I don't have to lissen to the wite rat go ON AND ON AND ON AND ON abowt his STOOPID berthday party. He's got party paks and games with prizes and his own groop on Catster, and if I have to lissen to him one more minit I'M GONNA PYUKE. Thare. I've sed it.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/this-is-stoopid-dawg-driving-car.html

HAPPY BERTHDAY, LATTE!

Latte the Meezer, hoo, like me, has to put up with an insufferuble wite rat, turns 1 yeer old today. (Sheesh, that's yung!) Happy berthday, bro!

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/happy-berthday-latte-latte-meezer-hoo.html

Evry nite, I wate in the frunt yard for the food lady to git home. After she turns off the bloo masheen, I go to the sidewok and role and role, and show her my tummy, and she rubs it reel nice and tells me how I'm her faverit cat and how I'm a good boy. Yes, it's troo. I'm more her faverit than that wite rat or the gutter cat. Of korse, I can hardly blame her. I'm the wun with all the persunality.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/maosMews/2006/09/evry-nite-i-wate-in-frunt-yard-for.html