Someone call Amnesty Intl --- or PETA!
I am being tortured. I don't know why (I'm always such a good boy!), but ever since I took the ride in the car to see the old man in the blue coat, the Food Lady and the Food Dude pin me down every single night and force this white thing down my throat. It makes me kinda heave and I try to spit it out, but they still keep doing it --- every single night. It has something to do with me having the squirts. So I guess the Food Lady and the Food Dude are trying to torture me into not having squirty poop anymore. But it's not like I have any control over it. The Food Dude told me it's the same thing he took when he got Delhi Belly after a trip to India. Like that's supposed to make me enjoy being tortured. Sometimes, I'm convinced they hate me.
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