I made a break for it!
Last night, when the Food Lady opened the door to the outside to get my big bruther Mao to come in, I seized the day and bolted thru the tiniest little opening to go outside. It was very late and very cold, and I didn't have my Cal (go bears!) sweater on, but I wasn't really that cold even though I'm a hairless runt, because I was so excited about being free. The Food Lady yelled my name and I think she might have said some bad words, too, but she couldn't catch me. I was too wily and crafty, just like a wild leopard.
The Food Dude wasn't home becuz he went to the ER because he sliced his finger open cutting up cardboard for recycling (the Food Lady said it was just like Monty Python and the Holy Grail with blood spurting everywhere, but I don't know what Monty Python is) and needed stitches, but the Food Lady couldn't go with him becuz she had something called the floo, which made her not do anything but pile on thirty blankets and sit in front of the television all day watching curling which does not seem to have anything to do with her hair (which was flat becuz she had the floo.)
Anyway, back to the chase.
The Food Lady had a hard time seeing me even though I kind of glow in the dark, becuz it was completely dark outside like a black hole. I let her git real close, and then I bolted and every time she'd yell SKEEZIX! but I was long gone. Finally, she started calling my big bruther Mao, and so when he came and trotted toward the front door, I ran up and jumped on top of him like I always do, and that's when she caught me and took me inside. By that time, it was okay, because I just about froze to death it was so cold. The Food Dude didn't git home from the ER until a few hours later, long after the Food Lady was asleep. He wasn't feeling so good because he got five stitches and good drugs, so he didn't even lock me out, and I got to sleep under the covers with the Food Lady all night, where I dreamed that I was a big cat on the Serengeti (which I know about becuz the Food Lady and the Food Dude read Nashunul Geografik before they go to sleep at nite).
The Food Dude wasn't home becuz he went to the ER because he sliced his finger open cutting up cardboard for recycling (the Food Lady said it was just like Monty Python and the Holy Grail with blood spurting everywhere, but I don't know what Monty Python is) and needed stitches, but the Food Lady couldn't go with him becuz she had something called the floo, which made her not do anything but pile on thirty blankets and sit in front of the television all day watching curling which does not seem to have anything to do with her hair (which was flat becuz she had the floo.)
Anyway, back to the chase.
The Food Lady had a hard time seeing me even though I kind of glow in the dark, becuz it was completely dark outside like a black hole. I let her git real close, and then I bolted and every time she'd yell SKEEZIX! but I was long gone. Finally, she started calling my big bruther Mao, and so when he came and trotted toward the front door, I ran up and jumped on top of him like I always do, and that's when she caught me and took me inside. By that time, it was okay, because I just about froze to death it was so cold. The Food Dude didn't git home from the ER until a few hours later, long after the Food Lady was asleep. He wasn't feeling so good because he got five stitches and good drugs, so he didn't even lock me out, and I got to sleep under the covers with the Food Lady all night, where I dreamed that I was a big cat on the Serengeti (which I know about becuz the Food Lady and the Food Dude read Nashunul Geografik before they go to sleep at nite).
Get XML Feed
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Links to this post:
Create a Link
<< Home