A daily journal by the ugliest, stinkiest cat ever born.
I was born the runt of the litter, and I'm still a scrawny little runt. Altho I'm allejidly a purebred Simeze/Balineze (I have "papers"!), I used to think maybe my mom was a ho and my dad was not the same dad that my byootiful sisters had until my best innernet frend Shabby pointed me to the Wikipedia entry for Oriental Shorthairs, and I fownd the Skeezix Family, including my twin, Mighty Mite. I have crossed eyes, a crook in my tale, satellite dish ears, a very lowd voice and really screwed up splotchy coloring. In short, I'm a mess. But I'm a kyoot mess. The Food Lady pikt me insted of pikking one of my byootiful sisters becuz I was spunky and outgoing and the butt-ugliest thing she'd ever seen. I make up for these shortcomings by being extremely personable, affekshunit and funny. Every morning, I lik Mr Tasty Face's tasty face to thank him for letting me stay. And I'm lucky becuz I have a big bruther, Mao, who teeches me things like how to be a picky eeter and how to project my voice frum the bottom of the stares to wake everybody up. Mao's the best big bruther in the entire werld.
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4 Comments:
Gosh, Skeezix! We never knew Victor was so famous...and he lives right here in Whiskonsin with us, but about an hour away. Anyway, we're happy we have a famous cat nearby!
Wow, my older housemate had brown and pink paw pads but not any spotted ones!!
Do yoo know if Whiskonsin is close to Castro Valley by the Big Forest? Maybe I'm only an howr away from VT, too! (I cood git thare in my stroller!)
Oh, Skeezix! You're such a good furiend! I wish you could visit by stroller, but I fink Castro Valley is in Catifornia, way far away from Whiskonsin. My boy goes to Catifornia in the summer fur a whole week an says it's a long trip efun by airplane. But MAYBE I can hide in his suitcase an go wif him next time! Then, I just need to get from El-lay to Castro Valley!
Oh, an fanks fur noticin my paw pads. Sum are pink, sum are black, an sum haf spots.
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