A daily journal by the ugliest, stinkiest cat ever born.
This is a cat named Harold. I fownd Harold on MySpace. Have yoo ever seen a more byootiful outfit? Well, if it were pink and wite insted of red and wite, it cood be more byootiful, but otherwise it's just PERFECT. Of korse, I had to order one. It's sumthing called an Elvis outfit. I don't know an elvis is, but I can't wate to git my own Elvis outfit!
I was born the runt of the litter, and I'm still a scrawny little runt. Altho I'm allejidly a purebred Simeze/Balineze (I have "papers"!), I used to think maybe my mom was a ho and my dad was not the same dad that my byootiful sisters had until my best innernet frend Shabby pointed me to the Wikipedia entry for Oriental Shorthairs, and I fownd the Skeezix Family, including my twin, Mighty Mite. I have crossed eyes, a crook in my tale, satellite dish ears, a very lowd voice and really screwed up splotchy coloring. In short, I'm a mess. But I'm a kyoot mess. The Food Lady pikt me insted of pikking one of my byootiful sisters becuz I was spunky and outgoing and the butt-ugliest thing she'd ever seen. I make up for these shortcomings by being extremely personable, affekshunit and funny. Every morning, I lik Mr Tasty Face's tasty face to thank him for letting me stay. And I'm lucky becuz I have a big bruther, Mao, who teeches me things like how to be a picky eeter and how to project my voice frum the bottom of the stares to wake everybody up. Mao's the best big bruther in the entire werld.
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4 Comments:
Harold and I should hook up and perform together. I too have an Elvis outfit from back in the day when I used to perform in Vegas! When you get your's, Skeezix, we could be a performing trio named The Feline Elvi!
OMGosh! I can't wait to see you in in Skeezix!! Lol!
Wow, this is going to make yoo luk soooo machure with a Rockstar flare.
I be the ladies are going to be all ovur yoo when yoo ware it. Yoo better brush up on yer lady skills!
Just think of the treats you'll get on Halloween, Skeezix!! Candy bars and cheeseburgers!!!
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