A daily journal by the ugliest, stinkiest cat ever born.
I was born the runt of the litter, and I'm still a scrawny little runt. Altho I'm allejidly a purebred Simeze/Balineze (I have "papers"!), I used to think maybe my mom was a ho and my dad was not the same dad that my byootiful sisters had until my best innernet frend Shabby pointed me to the Wikipedia entry for Oriental Shorthairs, and I fownd the Skeezix Family, including my twin, Mighty Mite. I have crossed eyes, a crook in my tale, satellite dish ears, a very lowd voice and really screwed up splotchy coloring. In short, I'm a mess. But I'm a kyoot mess. The Food Lady pikt me insted of pikking one of my byootiful sisters becuz I was spunky and outgoing and the butt-ugliest thing she'd ever seen. I make up for these shortcomings by being extremely personable, affekshunit and funny. Every morning, I lik Mr Tasty Face's tasty face to thank him for letting me stay. And I'm lucky becuz I have a big bruther, Mao, who teeches me things like how to be a picky eeter and how to project my voice frum the bottom of the stares to wake everybody up. Mao's the best big bruther in the entire werld.
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3 Comments:
We are so excited and honored to win your contest!! As we said in our email, we would like to sponsor Cinders. She is an older woman like Bathsheba and takes medicine like Jake.
Wow! The only think we've ever won before was the great party pack you sent us for your birthday, Skeezix. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Love,
~J&B
Um, Mom pointed out a typo. We meant THING instead of think. Why didn't you say something before we hit publish?
Thanks again,
~Bathsheba
Yeaaaaa, Jake and Bathsheba. Vary nice job guessing the post!!! Be sure to spray deer repelunt on yer lady too!!
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