A daily journal by the ugliest, stinkiest cat ever born.
I keep fergitting to post the pikchur of Mr Tinydik's blowup pumkin that he put in his frunt yard for Halloween. The Food Lady sed it was ubnokshusly big, wich wuz to be ixpekted. It was way way taller than Mr Tasty Face, and it made noize frum the blower. The Food Lady took the pikchur for me, but she had to hide in the bushes win the gates opend and one of his ubnokshus Hummers came owt and drove down the street by ware she wuz hiding.
I was born the runt of the litter, and I'm still a scrawny little runt. Altho I'm allejidly a purebred Simeze/Balineze (I have "papers"!), I used to think maybe my mom was a ho and my dad was not the same dad that my byootiful sisters had until my best innernet frend Shabby pointed me to the Wikipedia entry for Oriental Shorthairs, and I fownd the Skeezix Family, including my twin, Mighty Mite. I have crossed eyes, a crook in my tale, satellite dish ears, a very lowd voice and really screwed up splotchy coloring. In short, I'm a mess. But I'm a kyoot mess. The Food Lady pikt me insted of pikking one of my byootiful sisters becuz I was spunky and outgoing and the butt-ugliest thing she'd ever seen. I make up for these shortcomings by being extremely personable, affekshunit and funny. Every morning, I lik Mr Tasty Face's tasty face to thank him for letting me stay. And I'm lucky becuz I have a big bruther, Mao, who teeches me things like how to be a picky eeter and how to project my voice frum the bottom of the stares to wake everybody up. Mao's the best big bruther in the entire werld.
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6 Comments:
I can just picture the Food Lady hiding in the bushes!!!
Hmm, mr tinydik seems to be ofur com-pen-satin fur sumfing. jinormus howse, jinormus mashines an now a jinormus punkin.
Meowmy says that's really classy!
Our neighbor, Mr. Way Sted (funny smells come from his house a lot) puts a snowman like pumpkin in his backyard this time of year. He will inflate it a couple of times and it will like there all sad and flat until about May when he'll take it back inside. I like to watch it get covered with snow & mud.
Wow. That is a seriously big punkin. Mr. Tinydik sounds like a ray of sunshine... Not.
oh, we so wanna stick our claws in that! the Lady's thinking lawn darts.
i luv heerin abowt da obnokshus mr tinydik.
dat pumkin wuz verree obnokshus ... like da hummerman hizself!
i can't wate to see wut he putz up fer chrismas
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