Stroler Report
I went on a grate strole this weekend in my red Jeep Rubicon pet stroler. We went farther than we ever wint before, up and down hills, and past many many howses. We even wint to a park that had nice smelling green grass as far as yoo cood see. Cars wint by on the rode, but I wasn't a-scared because I felt very safe in my stroler.
At first, I tride sumthing new and I looked out the back window, then I switched to the front.
Win we got to the park, Mr Tasty Face took me owt of the stroler on my harniss, and let me walk arownd and smell stuff. Thare were trees and booshes, and big blak berdies that wint "KAW! KAW! KAW!" at the tops of thare lungs. They were kind of skarey. They reminded me of the flying monkeeys in the Wizerd of Oz, and I have to turn away win I see the flying monkeeys in the Wizerd of Oz becuz they make me so a-scared. But the berdies weren't too close, so it was just skarey, not terrufying like win yoo see yer hole life flash in frunt of yer eyes becuz yer abowt to become prey.
After the park, win I was bak in my stroler, we stroled down a new street that I'd never seen before. Mr Tasty Face made conversayshun. The Food Lady stopped and pikked up a bird nest that had fallen down and was at the side of the rode. She sed it was a bushtit* nest becuz it was made like a powch, and it was obveeusly for very small berdies. I liked the way it smelld.
And we kept going down this new street, and then, like majik, we were going by yards and houses that looked familyur to me --- somehow, we were on owr way home, even tho we'd never turned arownd to go back frum ware we came! As we got closer to my howse, a naybur ladey saw me in my stroler and sed,"Is that a.... what IS that?" and she came up close and looked in at me. And the Food Lady and Mr Tasty Face explaned that I was a cat -- an inside cat -- and this was how I got to go outside in the fresh air. And the nice naybur ladey sed I was byootiful! Nobuddy has ever sed that to me in my life! And then we started stroling agin, and after just a few more howses, we were home!
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* I know this looks like a cuppul of the werds on the list of bad werds I'm not supposed to say, but I'm just qwoting the Food Lady.
At first, I tride sumthing new and I looked out the back window, then I switched to the front.
Win we got to the park, Mr Tasty Face took me owt of the stroler on my harniss, and let me walk arownd and smell stuff. Thare were trees and booshes, and big blak berdies that wint "KAW! KAW! KAW!" at the tops of thare lungs. They were kind of skarey. They reminded me of the flying monkeeys in the Wizerd of Oz, and I have to turn away win I see the flying monkeeys in the Wizerd of Oz becuz they make me so a-scared. But the berdies weren't too close, so it was just skarey, not terrufying like win yoo see yer hole life flash in frunt of yer eyes becuz yer abowt to become prey.
After the park, win I was bak in my stroler, we stroled down a new street that I'd never seen before. Mr Tasty Face made conversayshun. The Food Lady stopped and pikked up a bird nest that had fallen down and was at the side of the rode. She sed it was a bushtit* nest becuz it was made like a powch, and it was obveeusly for very small berdies. I liked the way it smelld.
And we kept going down this new street, and then, like majik, we were going by yards and houses that looked familyur to me --- somehow, we were on owr way home, even tho we'd never turned arownd to go back frum ware we came! As we got closer to my howse, a naybur ladey saw me in my stroler and sed,"Is that a.... what IS that?" and she came up close and looked in at me. And the Food Lady and Mr Tasty Face explaned that I was a cat -- an inside cat -- and this was how I got to go outside in the fresh air. And the nice naybur ladey sed I was byootiful! Nobuddy has ever sed that to me in my life! And then we started stroling agin, and after just a few more howses, we were home!
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* I know this looks like a cuppul of the werds on the list of bad werds I'm not supposed to say, but I'm just qwoting the Food Lady.
Rocky 
I cood not figyure owt what these kitties were up to: what are they rapped in? My big bruther Mao sez that thare sleeping in sleeping bags, wich are kind of like our cat cups, except skwarish, and made of blankits. Yoo sleep in sleeping bags win yoo go camping. Has anywon ever bin camping? My big bruther Mao hasn't, and all he new was that win yoo go camping, yoo go into the big forest and cook over fire and yoo have to smeer smelly goop all over yer body to keep away the bugs, and win yoo are camping, all the werld is yer catbox. I don't know if I'd like to go camping (in fakt, I'm pritty shoor I don't want to go, becuz the vishus deer live in the big forest ware yoo have to go to go camping), but I wood like to sleep in that 
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