Skeezix's Scratching Post: December 2006

Luxor & Dragonheart have chozen... and Stevie, too!

Although only 2 Best Friends Animal Sanctuary cats sponserships were givin away as prizes in my Food Lady of the Yeer Award Kontest, thru the jenerosity of Luxor and One-eyed Stevie, a totul of FOUR cats were sponserd!!!! Luxor sponserd a secund cat, and one-eyed Stevie sponserd a cat even tho he didn't win a sponsership. HURRAY for Lux and one-eyed Stevie!! And congrats to Dragonheart, owr wild-card winner!

UPDATE: Mr Zenith and the Fancidots gang also sponserd TWO Best Frends cats. Go strate to his blog for all the deetales! Way to go, Mr Z and the hole Fancidots crew!!!

OPIE

Luxor pikt Opie. Heer's Opie's storey:

"Opie must be a Lord of the Rings fan, because he does his best to look like Gollum! When he's not skulking around, you'll find him hunched in the corner, looking suspicious. And he has had enough adventures to fill a book! Before he came to Best Friends, he had been wandering around Venice, California, dazed, hungry, and thirsty. Suddenly, he found himself trapped in a storm drain. He couldn't jump out! He was desperate. Little did he know, a dog would be the one to come to his rescue! A particular little dog and his person went for a walk every day past where Opie was trapped. And whenever they went by, the dog would stick his nose in to say hello. His person began to wonder what was in there. When she looked, she saw Opie! By the time he was rescued, he was really skinny - nearly dead!

"After Opie was found, he was brought to the vet where it was discovered that he has diabetes as well as a spinal injury from having once been hit by a car! Because his diabetes was untreated for so long, his back legs don't work so well - that's why he couldn't jump out of the storm drain. Opie had been tired, thirsty, and hurting for so long that he never thought he'd be happy again. But now that he's at Best Friends, he finds his mood improving every day. And it turns out that despite his sulky looks, he's a very personable cat."

(Rocky the Gutter Cat is also sponsering Opie, hoo is kind of a gutter cat!)

MINXIE

BUT! Not kuntent to win the sponsership of a Best Friends kitty, Lux also deesided to sponser Minxy:
Heer's Minxy's storey:
"Don't tell this elderly cat that she's lost her looks. She won't believe you! She thinks she's Cleopatra. She lounges and poses like a confident diva. She's very happy to meet you, and welcomes your petting. Her eyes never avert - why should they? She's fit to be a movie star! Please don't tell her that an old surgery has left her with a funny-shaped ear. We don't think she knows.

"Minxy was born in 1987. Not a spring chicken, but she's still got plenty of life! She was given up by an elderly woman who had a bad heart and didn't feel she could take care of her elegant cat any longer."

======== >^..^< ========

SKYWALKER

Dragonheart choze Skywalker becuz he had a cool name.
Heer's Skywalker's storey:

"He was named for the Jedi knight, but the name turns out to be perfect. Skywalker spends all his time roaming about way up high in the rafters of his cat roam -- in other words, "Skywalking". This gray and white guy has a funny little moustache, and a funny little personality. He grew up on the streets and doesn't have a whole lot to do with humans, but every day he meows and meows for his morning meal -- he's sure figured out that humans are good for one thing!

"Skywalker was born in 2002. He was living on the streets and is now at Best Friends, where this funny little Jedi knight with a moustache is excited to hear he's going to be up for sponsorship."

======== >^..^< ========

KIRA

And a big rownd of applawze to One-Eyed Stevie, hoo, even tho he didn't win a sponsership in the kontest, deesided to sponser a cat anyway... and he choze Kira, "because she has had to deal with lots of pain in her life, and because she still has scars on her eyes from infections, same as in Stevie's "good" eye."

Heer's Kira's storey:

"All purrs and cuddles! You'd never know the pain that Kira has endured. Kira was born in a crowded animal shelter. Her eye infections and respiratory problems never got treated - and they hurt something awful. She must have thought pain was just a part of life.

"Once, she got adopted, but her infections had let to worse and worse problems, and her new family just didn't have the money to treat her. That's why she's at Best Friends. Today, Kira is on heavy antibiotics, soothing eye drops, and of course, the most important - "love therapy". She has ulcers on her eyes from all the infections of the past. But she's feeling a lot better. She has friends at the sanctuary, and she is one of the friendliest cats. She always has a cuddle and purr for you when you visit."

>> Reed the winning entries heer.

>> Sponser yer own Best Friends Cat

Kismet's Pink Bathrobe is up!

Speeking of kyoot pink owtfits, Kismet's foto in the pink satin bathrobe is up! GO SEE IT RITE NOW!

Anuther Kyoot Pink Owtfit

Heer's anuther kyoot pink owtfit I got for Krissmiss frum my vary best frends Victor Tabbycat and Bonnie Underfoot. It's fleesy and kozy, and it even comes with a skarf I can put arownd my skinny nek to stay warm! Note the stylish pink buttons down the bak!

Chey's having a kontest!

Chey wunts sum help doing her Noo Yeer Rezolushuns. Ferst and secund place winners git sponsership of Best Frends cats! So whut are yoo wating for: Chek it owt!

New Bloggers: Princess Pearl & Mr Zenith!

Princess Pearl is new to the cat blogosfeer. She's a REEL princess becuz she wares a tiara and she livs in England. Maybe sum of owr Brit frends know her! Drop by for a spot of tee and add her to yer blogroll!

Princess Pearl: http://felinefinery.blogspot.com/

Mr Zenith is one of my very best frends EVER! He livs with the Fancidots gang - a bunch of Bengals hoo LOVE to play in water! Give him a big hello and add him to yer blogroll!!!

Mr Zenith: http://zenithsays.blogspot.com/

Frootbat Friday

Heer is a pikchur frum Krissmiss. They put me upstares, and win they do that and sumthing fun is going on downstares, I jump up on the rayling and look down and watch. Heer I am, looking down and watching.

MORE FROOTBATS:
>> Luxor
>> Daisy
>> Kaze
>> Dragonheart
>> Cheysuli
>> William
Are yoo frooty? Leeve me yer URL in the comments and I'll add yoo.

A Mitey Wind

We had a ginormus windstorm the other nite. Stuff was banging lowd owtside all nite long, and I was a-scared. Mr TF took pity on me and let evrybuddy in the peepul bedroom, but the Food Lady got mad at me becuz I had to do extra patrols with the wind blowing and evrything and I walked acrost her abowt 8 sqwillyun times wich made her wake up abowt 8 sqwillyun times, and she was a littul kross with me. Anyway, in the morning, it was like we'd had a hurrykane! Evrything in the bak yard blowed over or blowed away. The cover for the big rektanguler lake got yanked of the cement thingie it rests on along with the big pole it raps arownd, so Mr TF will have to dive into the pool to git it bak. And the wite chair thare is Rocky's faverit morning nappin' chair frum the other side of the yard, and the patio furnicher blowed over, inklooding the glass top, and I DON'T KNOW WARE THE UNDERBRELLA IS that is always on top of the tabul. The wind took it away, and it is ginormus and hevvy. And thare are a millyun tree limbs and leafs in the big rektanguler lake, and Trip's green cushun for his chair got blowed away. I gess that stuff is in the forest, now.

Thursday Thirteen: Edishun 14

13 Hilites frum the yeer in catblogging (in no partikyuler order):

Whut are yer faverit posts frum the last yeer?

Technorati Tags: thursday thirteen

Reed Bat & Bandit's Krissmiss Mirukul!!!

For a grate troo-life Krissmiss mirukul storey, go to Bat and Bandit's blog rite away!!

Can Yoo Adopt a Cat????????

The following is an emale I got frum Best Frends. Thare are a bunch of cats in the San Fransisko Bay Area hoo are in daynjer of being sent to the sausage faktery. If yoo can adopt one or know sumwun hoo can, pleeze help owt!

Dear Best Friends Members,

For years, the Magills have lived close to a park in Los Gatos that was a convenient dumping ground for unwanted cats.For years, Doug Magill and his wife have helped the cats abandoned near their home by providing them with medical care, food, shelter and love.

But now the Magills are the ones who need help.

As the couple has grown older, it has become harder for them to care for the 42 felines who live inside their home or outside on their property. Recently, someone called San Jose Animal Control to complain.

The officer who came out to visit the Magills could see that they were trying their best with the cats, who appeared to be healthy and friendly. He didn't want to confiscate the cats and take them to the shelter, so he agreed to work with the Magills as long as they continued trying to find other homes for the cats.

The Magills have managed to find homes for a few of the cats on their own, but they both have health problems that make it difficult to spend much time posting flyers or attending adoption events.

You can help them by spreading the word about these cats, many of whom are Siamese mixes. Please forward this email to anyone you know who might be able to assist the Magills in finding homes for their rescued cats. If you need more information or would like to adopt a cat yourself, please contact Doug Magill directly: 408-356-1602 or at dbmac@msn.com

Krissmiss Fotos

Heer I am with Krazey Lady. She wares lots of cat toys. She comes to owr howse with the tall sneezy man evry wunse in a wile. It's good she duzn't vizit too offin becuz she's KRAZEY. I cood not WATE to git owt of her arms.

Heer's Mr Tasty Face waring his festiv Krissmiss hat. I luv this hat. It has a spirally boingy thing on top with a star -- wich dubbles as a grate cat toy. As yoo can planely see, he is in a vary merry Krissmiss mood ... I think the hat makes him happy. And the glass of happy joose helps, too.

Heer I am helping Mr TF pass owt all the prezints. I'm looking hard for that one that OC and Carma sent to me...

Heer's me and Mr TF. See, he duzn't look as happy withowt his happy hat and his glass of happy joose.

Heer I am doing an inspekshun.

And heer I am helping myself to ore-dervs, wich is a fansy werd for cheeze and krakkers.

Happy Boxing Day!

In honor of boxing day, I got in a box:

And heer yoo can git a better look of the kyoot swetter I'm waring. It was sent to me by my best frend, Mr Zenith hoo has impekkubul tayst in fashun. It has silver sparkuleez weeved thru the fabrik:

And the Food Lady of the Yeer Award Goze to...

This was a vary vary hard kontest to judje. Thare were so many grate entreez, and after I red evry wun of them, I was reddy to vote that one as the winner. Qwite a few made my eyes leek, and they made the Food Lady's eyes leek, and Mr Tasty Face's, too. Make shur yoo all show yer entreez to yer Food Ladeez/Doods/Peepul so they can see just how grate they are!

I got the ideyuh for this kontest win I red abowt Lewis the Cat's Food Lady, Ruth Cisero. She's the wun hoo was reddy to go to jale to keep Lewis frum being condemmed to deth. She was vary brave (and qwite frankly, the Avon Lady dezervd to be attakt for coming into Lewis' yard uninvitid). Anyway, I was thinking of giving Ruth Cisero an award bak win I red abowt Lewis, but then I thot that all of my frends have GRATE Food Ladeez, and thare's probly a Ruth Cisero in thare sumware. So that's how this kontest startid.

This yeer, the nominayshuns razed $180 to be given to Libby Marie's Mom, Brandi's Mom and Oreo's Mom. They eech got $60 --- not a hole lot, but we wunted to let them know that they have frends in the blogosfeer hoo care abowt them.

Finulists were selektid by populer vote, and then a committey of me, my big bruther Mao, Rocky and Trip choze the Grand Prize Winner.

Anyway, to git to the winners.....!

FINULISTS
We ended up with SIX finulists insted of five frum over three hundred votes cast. Three of the finulists had the same number of votes. The six finulists are:

Eech of theeze finulists gits thare choice of a Skeezix the Cat Wall Kalinder OR a morfing Skeezix mug. IF YER A FINULIST AND YOO HAVEN'T ALREDDY TOLD ME, PLEEZE LET ME KNOW WICH ONE YOO WUNT -EETHER EMALE ME (skeezix AT skeezixthecat DOT com) or leeve a note in the comments feeld.!

WILD CARD WINNER
Next, thare was a wild card winner. This entrey was chozin at randum frum the non-finulists, and wins:

Sponsership of a Best Frends Cat in yoo or yer Food Lady/Dude's name AND
Choice of eether a Skeezix the Cat Morfing Mug or 2007 Skeezix the Cat Kalinder

And the wildcard winner is: Dragonheart's Hyoomans!

GRAND PRIZE WINNER
Choozing frum the finulists was reely reely tuff. Eech of theeze Food Peepul was extrodinery in thare own ways. One-eyed Stevie's Dad is owt to save the werld, one cat or Santa at a time. He's amazing, and a reely wunderful persun. Lux's Fuddy Duddy Food Dude reeminds me so much of Mr Tasty Face, it's unkanny. Deb Taylor is an amazing saver of cats, inclooding helping to save owr best frend, the intrepid reeporter, KC. Kimo and Sabi submitted the best nominayshun --- it was reely nicely done, with lots of good pikchurs, and it told evrything abowt thare Mommakitty hoo is anuther wunderful persun with a huge hart. Merlin's Daddy is a superstar for letting Merlin git a baby bruther (LT, hoo was heroikly reskyood by Bubbles' and Mrs B's ladey), and of korse Libby Marie Riley's mom hoo werked so hard to save Libby's life and to let her know in her last days how much she was loved.

In the end, we choze the winner as the nominee hoo got twice as many (yes, twice as many) votes as the 2nd place finisher. Aside frum the fakt that we wunted the winner to reflekt the voters' wishes, the winner was sumwun we'd love to have as a persun, and hoo imbodeez the very best of Food Lady/Dudehood. This nominee got votes frum all over the blogosfeer (not just like ten votes frum all the cats in his howse), many times more comments than any other nominayshun, and the cat hoo nominaytid him took the time to comment on neerly evry singul nominayshun (wich I haven't even bin abul to do yet). And ultimitly, the thing that deesided it for us was the foto in the nominayshun: it was just the sweetist thing, and also providid inkontrovertibul proof that this food dude has a vary tasty face, wich is an importunt part of being a good Food Dude.

So as yoo may have gest by now, Skeezix the Cat's Food Dude of the Yeer Award goze to Luxor's Fuddy Duddy Food Dude. Congratulayshuns! He wins:

A "Food Lady/Food Dude of the Yeer Award" Trofeey
$50 Amazon Gift Sertifikit
Sponsership of a Best Frends Cat in yoo or yer Food Lady/Dude's name
Whirly-bird Cat Toy for the cat hoo nominaytid yoo

I'd also like to aknolidje One-Eyed Stevie's Dad as the runnerup. We'll send Stevie a Whirly-bird Cat Toy.

HONERUBUL MENSHUNS
Two nominees came vary vary close to being finulists and shood by salooted, too: Jeter Harris' Dad and Danielle, hoo saved the Rode Ilund Kitteez (inclooding Kismet's new sister, Sophie). Sorry, yoo don't git prizes but, as a Yankee fan, Jete' shood know -- thare's always next yeer!

Thanks to evrywun hoo partisipaytid! I wish I cood have givin owt big prizes to evry single persun!

'Twas the Nite Beefore Krissmiss

A big Krissmiss Eve hello to all owr frends in the blogosfeer. Me and my big bruther Mao, my best frend and rasslin' buddy Rocky, and the psyko stray cat Trip are all gatherd rownd owr big fireplace (note to self: put owt the fire beefore Sandy Claws comes!).

Tonite we are gatherd to wish yoo all a vary Merry Krissmiss, and I will do that by telling a speshul Krissmiss poem that I rited all by myself mostly. It's called, "'Twas the Nite Beefore Krissmiss."

MAO: "Oh, bruther."

ROCKY: Let the kid talk. This is nice. The fire is vary warm and toasty and yoo wood not beeleeve how wild thoze Krissmiss lites looks after a few hits of nip!!! All yoo spicy vixins, come over and kerl up with ole' Rockyboy!!!! We've got lots of kozy kitty blankits, vary fleesy and warm, and sum nip cookies, and warm milk spikt with Rocky's speshul blend!

TRIP: [Talking a hundred miles an hour] I git yer overflow!!!! I've got giant wisker humps and enormus paws! Hoo wunts to sit by me??? [Lunges at the plate of cookies and scatters them on the floor.] Whoops! My Bad! Hey, Merry Krissmiss evrybuddy I'm so glad to have a nice warm home and that I don't hafta live in the forist anymore Hey, hoo wunts to help me nok down the Krissmiss tree??? Huh? anybuddy? Wo Rocky did yoo invite ALL yer spicy vixins?

MAO: "Oh, bruther."

SKEEZIX: C'mon yoo guys! It's time for my Krissmiss poem! Greet owr gests and help git evrywun settled in! We've gotta git done and git into bed beefore Sandy Claws comes!

MAO: Yeah, rite. Whutever. Okay, evrybuddy. How abowt Meezers and cool cats over by me. Nawty gerls over with Rocky. Psyko kitties, take yer life in yer hands and sit by Trip. There. Are we dun? Can I nap now?

SKEEZIX: Mao, be nice. It's Krissmiss. Okay is evrywun reddy and cumfy??? [Clears his throat.] Heer we go!

'Twas the Nite Beefore Krissmiss

a poem by Skeezix the Cat

'Twas the nite beefore Krissmiss, and all thru the blogs
Not a creechur was posting, not even the dawgs.
The stockings were hung so they lookt reely nice,
Stuffed with catnip and toys and Temptayshuns and mice.
Mao and Rocky and Trip were asleep in thare beds,
While vizhuns of Fancy Feest danced in thare heds.
I was snuggled up warm in my pink satin robe,
Working hard at removing some poop frum my toe.

When out on the lawn thare arose such a rakkit,
I got up to investigate and maybe attak it.
I peeked thru the shutters and glanced at the lawn
And looked up the street to whut looked like the dawn:
Mr Tinydik’s howse was ablaze in wite lite
So the street looked like daytime, even tho it was nite.
When then whut to my wundering eyes shood apeer,
But a fat geezer guy and 8 vishus ranedeer!

The geezer was spry – he was lively and qwik,
So I thot then that Rocky must’ve slipt me sum ‘nip.
My throte closed with terror as deer filld the sky
He yelled owt thare names as they eech past me by:
"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!
We must find the home of that Skeezix the Cat!
He’s got big frootbat ears, and he’s not vary fat!
His frunt porch still reeks of that VDR stuff
So plug up yer nozes – this cood git kinda ruff!”

I felt a wet warmness go down my wite thigh
I had just wet my pants watching deer in the sky.
Shood I wake my frends Rocky and Maobert and Trip?
No --- they’d just spent the nite doin’ Rocky’s skank nip
I was shur they’d be useless aginst all theeze deer
So I grabbed sum Repelunt, and swallowed my feer!
I snuk owt the door withowt making a sownd,
And shiverd a bit as my paws hit the grownd.

I looked at the top of the Tinydiks’ home
And saw 8 vishus deer with that fat geezer gnome.
The deers were a-snorting and pawing so lowd,
That thare breth roze in puffs to a big deer-breth clowd.
I coodn’t beeleeve whut I saw on that roof,
When just then a deer lookt at me, pointing his hoof!
I froze in my traks, and I shivered with frite
Cuz I knew that my last day on erth was tonite!

The deer sed, “That’s Skeezix! The innernet cat!
Yoo can see he’s a runt with a tail like a rat!”
I held the Repelunt, and tride to think fast
Knowing evry werd spoken cood well be my last.
I sed, “Yes, I'm Skeezix, of innernet fame!
And if yoo don’t leeve, yoo’ll be sorry yoo came!”
The deers started laffing; the geezer stept up,
And kindly, he sed to me, "Skeezy, wassup?”

I was kot off my gard by his his kool gangsta patter,
As he jumped frum the roof and sed, “Skeez, whut’s the matter?
I’m yer frend, Sandy Claws, and I bring yoo good cheer
Not to menshun sum gifts, cuz yoo’ve bin good all yeer!”
I sed, “Prezints for ME? Yoo have got to be kidding,
Yoo’ve got 8 vishus deer hoo are doing yer bidding!”
He sed, “My deer arn’t vishus. Thare speshully bred
To fly like the wind far above yer wite hed.
And they never eet cats, neether yung ones nor geezers
Cuz thare vegans – they won’t even eet joosy meezers.”

I was stunned. Cood I trust him? Or was this a scam
To lure me, then eet me with butter and jam???
The deer all turned toward me, the moment was tense
I realized I didn’t have much of a defense ---
Thare wasn’t repelunt enuf for 8 deers,
Cood I dare to beeleeve whut I’d herd with my ears?
My intesstins were churning, my voicebox was myoot,
When Prancer sed, “Wow, that pink robe is reel kyoot!
Do yoo mind if I ask ware it was that yoo got it?
I’d like to git one of my own ware yoo bot it.”

Frum then on I forgot that the deers were a thret
As we talked abowt satin and silk and georgette.
Just then Sandy swooped down and grabbed me in his kote
He sed, “Skeezix, yer freezing, yoo’ll git a sore throte!
Let’s go in yer howse and I’ll warm yoo sum creem,
Tuk yoo into yer bed: yoo’ll think this was a dreem!”
I’ll admit I was kold, so I crawled in his pockit,
Wile the deer pulled the slay to the sky like a rokkit.
He fixt me sum creem and he tukt me in bed,
And he lade a big kiss on the top of my hed.

He was dresst all in fur and his owtfit was kyoot,
But his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
A bundle of cat toys he’d flung on his bak,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pak.
He dumpt lots of gifts underneeth owr big tree
Lots of catnip for Rocky, and owtfits for me.
Mao got his Greenies, and Trip got sum toys
It was qwite a big hawl for the 4 of us boys.

In the morning I tride to explane whut I’d seen,
But no one beleeved that it wuzn’t a dreem.
But now I'm aware that 8 mutant ranedeer
Hoo were bred to be vegans are not to be feerd.
They reely won’t eet me – in fakt, thare my frends
And that’s how this Krissmisstime poem now ends.
Just like Santa called owt as they flew owt of site,
“Merry Krissmiss to all, and to all a good nite.”

MERRY KRISSMISS EVRYWUN!!!!

>> Don't fergit to drop by Kimo & Sabi's Place for thare "The Night Before Cat-mas"!

Dona Nobis Pacem

A Krissmiss Eve blog blast for peese!

Mr Tinydik's Krissmiss Lites

A lot of yoo have bin klammering for pikchurs of Mr Tinydik's Krissmiss lites. I finely got the Food Lady to take a pikchur. It's a littul blurry becuz the Food Lady didn't wunt to take a tripod becuz the Tinydiks have a bunch of seekyurity camras. But yoo git the ideeyuh. The lite show is surprizingly subdood, but he did make shur that evrywun is aware that he has the tallest howse in the nayberhood. Maybe even the hole entire metropoliss of Castro Valley by the big forest.

By the way, Mr Tinydik's home will be feechured in my speshul Skeezix the Cat Krissmiss Eve verzhun of "'Twas the Nite Beefore Krissmiss." So drop by tomorrow nite! Plenty of treets and creem for evrywun! And my best frends Kimo & Sabi have posted thare verzhun "The Night Before Cat-Mas" on thare blog! It's a must-reed!

Free E-Cards

Thru my website yoo can send free Christmas e-cards inclooding the popyuler deezines below. It will prompt yoo to log in, but that's just a trik. Yoo can send a ecard withowt being a member.

More Krissmiss Eve Eve Fotos

Heer is my reely reely kyoot Krissmiss owtfit. It's velvity, and it has a snowflake on it, and snowflakes in the patturn of the velvit. And it has a wite fur collar. I don't need to tell yoo how stylish it is.

Mr Tasty Face helped me see the ornamints way hi up on the Krissmiss tree. The Krissmiss tree is ginormus, and way taller than Mr Tasty Face. I like sitting on his sholder and chekking them owt.

This is just me and Mr TF. I'm waring my kyoot kyoot Krissmiss owtfit in this foto, too. Notiss how big I am compared to Mr TF's hands. I'm not a big man cat!!! (Do yoo think Sandy Claws wood giv me big-man-cat-hood for Krissmiss?)

We Dekoraytid My Tunnel!!

FINELY!!!! I didn't git a grate PINK Hello Kitty Krissmiss tree like my best frend, Rocky Ann did, but at leest they dekoraytid my tunnel today and gave me MY OWN KRISSMISS TREE!!!!

Heer I am, trying it owt.

Isn't it BYOOTIFUL!!!

HAPPY BERTHDAY, BOOGERS!!!!!

If yer a Catster member (and yoo shood be), be shur to drop by my best frend Boogers' berthday party today. KLIK HEER TO PARTAY!!!! Happy Berthday, Boogers!!!!!

Peece Globes on Krissmiss Eve!

Thare will be anuther Peece Globe blast on Krissmiss Eve.... Yoo can use the peese globes yoo have or make new Krissmissy ones. Deetales are heer.

Thanks for yer nominayshuns!

Thank yoo all for yer nominayshuns for my Food Lady/Dude of the Yeer Award! We exseeded owr gole, and as a reezult, sent $60 eech to Libby Marie's Mom (for Libby's vet bills), Brandi's Mom (hoo is owt of werk), and Oreo's Mom (hoo has many many peepul vet bills). Hopefully, the munney will arrive beefore Krissmiss if the man in the bloo shorts drives his sporty wite jeep reely fast!

VOTING ENDS KRISSMISS EVE
So tell evrywun yoo know to vote for yer nominee! Blog badges are avaylubul on the kontest page to promote yer nominee. The register to vote link is: http://www.skeezixthecat.com/floty/register.html

HOW DO I VOTE?
Once yoo register, an emale will be sent to the emale adress yoo rejistered with. Only one vote is permitted for eech valid emale adress. In the rejistrayshun emale, yoo'll git a link to the ballot. Klik the link, sine in, and vote. The ballut is in alfabetical order listed as the entry apeers in the Qwik Links list at the top of the kontest page. Submit yer vote and yer done! If yoo are a cat hoo nominaytid sumwun, yoo can vote a secund time IN THE COMMENTS FEELD OF YER NOMINAYSHUN POST. This secund vote must be for sumwun other than yer Food Lady/Dood/Peepul/Vet -- as in, yoo can't vote for yerself with the secund vote.

COMMENTS MAKE A DIFFRINSE
Win the voting commiteey deesides wich of the 5 finulists will win, if it's close, we may rely on the comments left for the nomineez to swing owr deesizhun. So pleeze leeve comments on yer faverit nomineez -- it cood make a diffrinse!

Frootbat Friday

MORE FROOTBATS:

>> Luxor (sorry, Lux!)
>> Daisy
>> Kaze
>> Dragonheart
>> Cheysuli
>> William

Are yoo frooty? Leeve me yer URL in the comments and I'll add yoo.

Thursday Thirteen: Edishun 13

My ferst Thirteen Pikup Lines I thot of to git gerls to go owt with me win I get up enuf kerrije to talk to a gerl.

I think sumtime within the next 4 or 5 yeers I mite ask a gerl cat to go owt on a date with me, so I'm starting my planning erly. Rocky advizd me to come up with sum pikup lines. Pikup lines are whut yoo say to git the gerls intristid in gitting to know yoo better. So heer are the ferst thirteen I came up with:

Bond. Skeezix Bond. (This is the wun I use win I'm waring my tuxeedo.)
I can put my ankles behind my nek. Can yoo?
I'm a Love Pirate, and I'm here for your booty! ARRRGGGHHH!!! (Rocky helped me with that one.)
You must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet.
I've got the kyootist pink satin bathrobe... wanna try it on?
I know I'm not much for looks, but byooty is only a lite switch away.
I've had a hoohaectomy.
Stop, drop, and roll, baby: yer on fire.
Do yoo.... Yahoo?
I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make yer Bedrock!
If byooty were time, yoo'd be eternuty.
I got a thirst, baby, and yoo smell like my toona joose.
Yoo know whut they say abowt guys with big ears...!

Technorati Tags: thursday thirteen

Happy Hollydaze!

Jingle Cats!

This is my faverit Krissmiss Song (Ixsept for the barking part.) Turn up yer volyoom to hi!!!!

Vishus Rednek Ranedeer

Whut with all the vishus ranedeer arownd the past few weeks, the Vishus Deer Nayberhood Watch Groop* is SMOKIN' with vishus deer reports acrost the country.

My deer frend (no pun intended) Rue Rue sent me a foto wich sugjests the hyoomans may finely be klooing in to the vishus deer thret and doing sumthing to protekt us. WARNING: the link kuntanes a foto wich the Food Lady wood deeskribe as "sik". But she's smiling win she sez it.

>> SEE THE Rednek Ranedeer foto

And lookee whut intrepid reeporter KC sent to me:

-----------------------------------
* The Vishus Deer Nayberhood Watch Groop is open to anywun. To join, yoo need to be a member of Catster (it's free!) and the Frends of Skeezix (FOS) Groop.

Badges for yer Blogs

You askt for it: yoo got it! Badges for your blogs asking peepul to vote for yer Food Ladeez and Men for my Food Lady/Dude/Peepul of the Yeer Award. It's best to link direktly to yer entry. To do so, go to the qwik links list and rite-kilk on yer link. Select "properties" and it will display the URL. Copy that and use it as the link for this image.

The "register to vote" link is: http://www.skeezixthecat.com/floty/register.html

KOLD!

It's bin vary freezing kold heer lately. Evry nite, sumwun named Jak Frost has come to vizit, but even tho I stade up late so I cood see him, he always comes win I'm asleep. So I spend a lot of time in my pink korderoy kote with sheepskin lining, and most of my day is spent going frum heetid cat bed to heetid cat bed. I haven't come up with a remedy for my freezing kold ears --- I don't like anything that mooshes them down, so earmuffs are owt. Since they occupy much of my body's sqware footije, win thare cold, I'm cold: brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Welcome Daisy!

My best frend Daisy has started a blog. Thare are many many reezins yoo shood reed Daisy's blog. Ferst of all, it's PINK. Second of all, she's a vary vary kyoot frootbat. Therd of all, she thinks I have nice mussuls. Forth, she has a vishus gator in her backyard that yoo absolootly must see. Fifth, she has a vary adorubul Santa owtfit. Sixth, her mommy looks vary nice. Seventh, she has a nit hoodie with a tassel on top that I wood just love to have. 8th: DO YOO REELY NEED MORE REEZINS???? Just go thare and add her to yer blogroll!

Tummy Toozday

Jenerully, thare arn't too many tummy fotos of me becuz I don't sleep on my bak that much and I am whut they call "svelt" wich meens I'm bilt like Barney Fife and I don't have a big ole' flab purse hangin' down frum my tummy. But heer's a rare tummy foto of me, with my rat tale showing. My nice pink pawpads are also showing, but we don't have a Pink Pawpad day of the week.

Krissmiss Treet: Storytime!!!!

We are in for a treet! And it's free!

Smudge's sister, Dolce has invited us all over to thare howse in Canada for Storytime! As most of yoo know, Dolce's dad is a master storyteller, and he is telling a speshul Krissmiss storey this week! It started last nite, and will kontinyoo for a few nites. Dolce is serving warm milk and catnip cookies! It just duzn't git any better than this!

So hed over to thare blog evry nite this week and gather at Dolce's chair for Krissmiss storeytelling! SEE YOO THARE!!!

Last Day for Eclair's Kontest!

Today, I finely got the Food Lady to do sumthing for Eclair's kontest. It's the pikchur above (yoo can klik to biggify). It shows Rocky and Me (I'm the littul wite wun), my big bruther Mao and Trip' the Psyko Stray Cat. I tride to be the art direkter and gave her sum helpful sugjestchuns on how to make it look more reealistik, but she hadn't had enuf coffee yet --- and yoo know whut THAT meens!

Anyway, midnite is the dedline for Eclair's kontest, so thare's still time! GO HEER to enter or emale yer entry to Eclair's mom: thaeloblueATgmailDOTcom.

Krissmiss Lites!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tonite, I had the vary best advenchur of my hole entire life, ixsept maybe for the Chuck Erreca Rest Stop! I got to go see Krissmiss lites!!!!! I think they let me do Krissmiss stuff becuz today I wore my nicest Krissmiss swetter, wich is snuggly red shuh-neeel with sparkles and it has a froofy wite collar. So win they saw my nice kyoot red owtfit, they probly thot I wunted to do sum Krissmiss sellubrating .... and they were rite! (We coodn't reely look at Krissmiss lites frum my stroler becuz it's whut they call "Freezin Ash Cold" heer rite now. That meens it is so cold that win the ashes frum the fires in yer fireplace come up the chimney, they freeze win they hit the owtside air: that's c-c-c-c-c-cold!) So we got in the bloo masheen and wint owt to look at Krissmiss lites wich I had never seen before in my hole entire life!!!! (No, she did not let me drive becuz the bloo masheen has a stik shift, wich meens that to drive it, I wood have to steer the weel wile my big bruther Mao does the shifting, and that will never happen becuz win Mao goze in the bloo masheen he yowls so lowd my ears bleed.)

This was also a reeserch trip, since I was investigayting how danjerus thoze lited vishus deer skeletons are. I've herd many reeports of them, so I deesided to go see for myself!

Let me tell yoo, Krissmiss lites are vary byootiful!! They are like the most byootiful glittery Bob Mackie dress (wich, btw, I wood LOVE to have for Krissmiss, Sandy Claws!), only way bigger. And thare are Santas and elfs and snowmen and all kinds of grate stuff in frunt of peepuls' howses! It took my breth away! So here are sum of the fotos and my insiteful kommuntery:

I saw many many lited vishus deer skeletuns, and theeze wuns were the scariest becuz THEY MOOVED! I was happy to be safe inside the bloo masheen in Mr Tasty Face's arms!

Heer I am chekking owt more vishus deer skeletuns.
Theeze wuns did NOT moove, so yoo can see that I'm a littul bolder abowt chekking them owt.

This was a vary nice display. It had big snowmen --- EVEN THO IT WUZN'T SNOWING! How'd they do that? And they had Sandy Claws and Krissmiss Trees and all kinds of other blowup stuff. My big bruther Mao sez the only kind of gerlfrend I cood ever git wood be a blowup gerlfrend, and that werries me becuz theez blowup things are ginormous! A blowup gerlfrend that size wood sqwish me like a bug!

I fownd it was grate being abul to sit on the spayshus dashbord of the bloo masheen to git a reely good look wile being vary close to the heeter vents! This foto shows off my kyoot Krissmiss owtfit qwite nicely! If yoo look close, yoo can see the silvery sparklies in my swetter.

Yoo need to klik this wun to biggify it so yoo can see whut a byootiful yard this is! Thare are lites EVRYWARE! And Sandy Claws, too! I wish we livd at a grate howse like this!

The Food Lady complaned that it was hard to take fotos that shode both me and the lites. So heer is one ware yoo can see the owtline of me aginst the lites.

Sumtimes, the best vyew was owt the bak window.

At howses like this wun, thare was just so much to see!!! I coodn't take it all in in just one look! I had to look one way, and then anuther! I cood have stade thare all nite!

More lited vishus deer skeletuns. They did not seem to be vary agressiv, but I kept my Mao & Rocky's Vishus Deer Repelunt reddy just in case!

Heer we are bak at home. I'm pozing next to the vishus deer on owr porch, wich is the site of Rocky's industreeyul aksident. This obveeusly is not a reel vishus deer, otherwize it woodn't be thare becuz the hole area REEEKS frum Mao & Rocky's Vishus Deer Repelunt. I coodn't stik arownd too long myself.

As yoo can planely see, looking at Krissmiss lites is a vary wunderful an ixsiting thing to do. Yoo shood try it!!!!

DEDLINE MONDAY for Food Lady of the Yeer Award Nominayshuns!

We've got 32 nominayshuns for my Food Lady of the Yeer Award. Nominayshuns close MIDNITE MUNDAY 12/18.

YOO'LL HELP OWT A FREND IN NEED BY ENTERING --- For evry entry in the kontest (up to a max of 50 entreeez), I will donate $1 eech to Brandi, Oreo, and Libby Marie's moms. Brandi's mom is owt of werk, Oreo's Mom has huge peepul-vet bills and Oreo is trying to help owt, and Libby Marie's mom has big vet bills. So, just by entering yoo can help owt a cat in need! If thare are 50 entreez, Brandi, Oreo and Libby Marie will EECH git $50. (As of today, eech will git $32.)

NEW PRIZES ANNOWNST!

The 5 FINULISTS
Win thare choice of eether a Skeezix the Cat morfing mug or a Skeezix the Cat 2007 kalinder.

GRAND PRIZE WINNER
The Grand Prize winner will git the following:

An engraved "Food Lady/Food Dude of the Yeer Award" Trofeey
$50 Amazon Gift Sertifikit
Sponsership of a Best Frends Cat in yoo or yer Food Lady/Dude's name
Whirly-bird Cat Toy for the cat hoo nominaytid yoo

WILDCARD PRIZE

A name will be chozin at randum frum the non-finulists and reeseeve the following:

Sponsership of a Best Frends Cat in yoo or yer Food Lady/Dude's name
Choice of eether a Skeezix the Cat Morfing Mug or 2007 Skeezix the Cat Kalinder

>> Submit yer nominayshun today!

Me and Mr TF

Even tho I'm not ellijibul to win the prize, I'm still going to nominayte Mr Tasty Face as the Food Dood of the Yeer (after all, hoo else has a Food Dood hoo takes him to see GOTES???). So heer's the offishul portrit we took together. It's not as good as Luxor's Mr Fuddy Duddy foto, but I like it anyway. Yoo can see I have my left arm arownd the bak of Mr TF's nek.

GOTES!!!!!

I had a vary thrilling afternoon. Mr Tasty Face took me for a walk and we saw GOTES!!!! They looked like big Skeezixes, but they had HORNS! I coodn't tell if they wanted to skewer me or not, but they seemed vary frendly.

I also saw a horsie. The horsie was GINORMOUS!!! I never saw one up close before and I didn't know they were so big!!!

As yoo can planely see, I was vary brave arownd theeze animuls even tho they were vary much bigger than me. Of korse, I woodn't hezitate to wip owt my Mao & Rocky's Vishus Deer Repelunt if it was nessessary.

Frootbat Friday

The Food Lady got me a kittin! And hey, he looks like me! But win I snift his butt: nuthin'. Vary peekyoolyer. He has a nice fashun sense, tho...!

PS - Lux izn't doing a Frootbat foto this week. Drop by his blog....

MORE FROOTBATS:

>> Kaze
>> Dragonheart
>> Cheysuli
>> William

Are yoo frooty? Leeve me yer URL in the comments and I'll add yoo.

THE WINNERS ARE......

I am thrild to annownse the winners of the "Gess my 600th Post Kontest". My 600th post was publisht on Sunday December 10th at 8:39pm

DRUMROLE PLEEZE..........

It's Rosie and Cheeto! Thare gess was 12/10 at 8:22 pm.

Thare prize is:

If yoo wunt one of theeze grate mugs, yoo can eether buy wun heer... or wate for anuther grate kontest!

Terryfying Song

I can hardly tipe: I'm still shaking.

I just herd the song, "Gramma Got Runned Over by a Ranedeer," and I lerned that GIT THIS: it was ritten by a vet-man, Dr Elmo. So it's not bad enuf that the vishus deer are eeting tender yung joosy cats, now thare going after Grammas!!! And Grammas are definitly not tender, yung and joosy!!! Wich meens that my big bruther Mao and Rocky had better watch owt! And all yoo other geezer cats, too! (The only thing that mite save me is that owr frunt porch still REEKS frum Rocky's industreeyul aksident, so nobuddy --- inclooding vishus deer --- wunts to git neer owr howse!)

The Vishus Deer Nayberhood Watch Groop has been SMOKIN' this last week. Dutchess has been making amayzing progress in her reeserch, so if yer an FOSer, drop by!

>> Vishus Deer Nayberhood Watch Groop (for FOS* members, only. Wunt to join FOS? Let me know!)

--------------------------------
* The Frends of Skeezix Groop on Catster. Members git FOS buttuns and stuff, and it's the home of the vishus deer nayberhood watch groop. Catster is free to join, and evrybuddy is welcome to join FOS. Emale me if yoo wunt to join.

Thursday Thirteen: Edishun 12

Thirteen Reezins it’s grate having big ears:

I can get radio signuls frum Irkutsk.
I can heer win the can of Fancy Feest Sliced Turkey in Gravy is being opend frum any spot in the howse.
Evrybuddy spends so much time fokussing on how hyooje my ears are that they don’t notiss how ugly the rest of me is.
It’s hard to find hats to fit me over my ears, so I don’t have to ware hats vary offin. I don’t like warin’ hats much cuz they sqwoosh my ears.
Win it’s windy, my ears akt as sales that propell me along so I can run faster than my legs wood normully take me.
I can make awesum shadow puppits on the wall of the Himilayuhs.
I can eezily maskerade as a chiwawa winever I wunt to. I’ve never wunted to, but I cood. If I wunted to.
I can heer win the marawding bands of vishus deer are reeking havuk in owr nayburhood in plenty of time for me to hide under the bed or in the bak of the klosit.
No matter ware they are in the howse, I can heer Rocky or Mao win they blow chunks, so I can run rite over and chek it owt wile it’s fresh!
Hot chiks like Daisy and Ella and Kaze dig ‘em.
They help me be more ixpressiv in my body langwidge. I can use them like exklamayshun points.
If the blogging kareer duzn’t werk owt, I can always git a job as a frootbat or a satellite dish.
Win Mao and Rocky and me play Star Trek, I always git to be the Ferengi.

Technorati Tags: thursday thirteen

Anuther Libby Marie Fundrazer

UPDATE: The ferst batch of qwilts has SOLD OWT: YAY! Thank yoo all for helping Libby Marie. Thare will be more of theeze grate qwilts avaylubul in anuther day or 2. Bat 'n' Bandit's mom is sowing as fast as she can!!!

Bat and Bandit's Mom has a gift: she's a werld-famus qwilter hoo wunts to pitch in to help with Libby Marie's vet bills. So she's making and selling GORJUS cat qwilts (2 of wich are displade beelow), with the net proseeds going to Libby Marie's Vet Bill fund. Cat Qwilts are abowt 21 inchis sqware, and are purrfikt for cat beds. Diffrint colors and patterns are avaylubul: go look! THAY ARE ONLY $15, PEEPUL!!! She's been berning the midnite oil to make as many as she can to help Libby Marie's famly! Buy wun and do a werld of good: make yer faverite cat happy and help the famly of Libby Marie!

>> SHOP AND BUY NOW

>> CLIK FOTOS TO SEE BIGGER <<

AND THARE'S MORE.... GO LOOK!

>> Bat and Bandit's Blog

The Power of Pawsitiv Thinking

UPDATE: link fixed!

Today's lessun is in the power of pawsitiv thinkin'. Pawsitiv thinkin' is the oppuhsit of Stinkin Thinkin. It's like looking at yer food dish and thinkin' "wow, I've still got haff a plate left: yum!," insted of, "oh, poop, toona AGIN??" Heer's anuther izxampul. Rosie and Cheeto. Yoo may notiss that Rosie espeshully is always upbeet. Maybe it's the nip or maybe it's just becuz she's frum Myamee, or maybe she just likes being thot of as a spicy vixin by Rocky the Gutter Cat. Anyway, they left a comment heer that was vary pawsitiv. They were channulling winning vibes and doing the carpet deeum thing. And yoo know, even if they end up being big loozers, I'll bet that Rosie and Cheeseballs will be the ferst to congradyulayte the winner, cuz that's the way they are.

I just bring this up becuz it's bin a vary vary ruff week, my face has leeked a lot, and during times like that, it's nice to have grate frends like Rosie and Cheeto hoo make me smile. Rosie and Cheeto, I saloot yoo!!!!

I'm also bringing it up becuz the winner of the "Gess the 600th Post Kontest" will be annownst this week!

>> Rosie and Cheeto's Blog

Owr Krissmiss Kards Came!!!

Me and my big bruther Mao are VARY ixsited that owr Krissmiss kards and Krissmiss stamps finely came! We were gettin' werried that the man in the bloo shorts took 'em becuz they are SO AWESUM, and also becuz I need a lot of time to sine my name to the cards. Holding a pen is VARY much harder than tiping. But now thare heer and I can git to it!!! We orderd abowt a millyun or maybe five millyun of them to send to all owr frends. We're gonna let Rocky sine his name to owr cards becuz he didn't git a card of his own on akownt of he won't ware a Santa Hat or dress in any kyoot clothes. He sez the ladeez like ole' Rocky "oh natchurell" whutever that meens. Maybe Sadie or Daisy Mae can ixplane.

Skeezix the Cat 2007 Calendars are Heer!

Yoo can klik heer to vyoo all the calendar pages, and the ordering page is heer.

Purrayers needed for Smudge

UPDATE: This frum Smudge's Dad:

I first want to thank everyone for their well wishes regarding Smudge. As I write this, he is in for surgery. We won't know anything until 2:00pm MST. Once we know, I will post the news, good or bad. UPDATE: 12:00pm Smudge's surgery was cancelled. His levels are right back up and he has lost another 11 percent of his weight. Dr. Nick does not think that Smudge would survive the procedure. He has advised us to start looking at managing the remainder of Smudge's days as best we can. Who knows, Smudge might even surprise us.

If yoo haven't done so alreddy, drop by Smudge's blog and let his man know that thare both in owr thots and purrayers.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Most of yoo know my best frend, Smudge, hoo was the winner of the Tails of Devoshun Kontest. Today, Smudge goze in for surjery. It is espeshully hard for Smudge's Man, hoo will not be home for the surjery. It's bin a diffikult time for his man hoo has been hit frum all sides theeze last kuppul of weeks.

Heer's why Smudge needs surjery: "Smudge has a urolith (stone) that is blocking part of his ureter on the right hand kidney. If they remove the stone, the excess pressure being caused on his kidney would be relieved and no further damage would be caused. If they leave it, it could move back into the kidney and do even more damage."

Yoo can reed all the deetales on Smudge's blog. We need to pray reel hard for Smudge that he will git thru surjery, and pray hard for his man, hoo can't be at Smudge's side.

PLEEZE drop by Smudge's blog and wish him well, and if yoo have time, drop by the transkript of last nite's Pet Prayer and Praise Blog ware we purrayed for Libby Marie, her famly, Smudge and his famly, and efurrywun else hoo needs help.

Farewell Libby

My face is leeking as I rite this. Owr deer deer frend Libby Marie Riley wint to the Ranebow Bridge in hevven this morning. She slipt away peecefully in her sleep under her Krissmiss tree. Libby Marie was one of the best frends I ever had, and sertinly one of the sweetest frends I have ever known. I know that all of us are vary vary sad to have lost yoo, Libby, but look forward to the day that we can be reyoonited. I am vary vary reeleevd that yoo did not suffer long.

If yoo wood like to help Libby Marie's famly defray her vet-man bills, thare are sevrul things yoo can do:

Thare will be a vijil at the Pet Prayer and Praise Blog tonite at 9pm EST ware yoo can show yer support. Libby's mom may tell her story.
Libby's mom is liting memorial candles for a $1 donayshun. GO HEER FOR DEETALES.
Pawtisipate in a Krissmiss challenje (and send yer challinje munney to Libby's Mom). KISMET has bin challenjed to poze for a pikchur in the froofy pink bathrobe. Yoo can let Kismet know whut yer challenje will be. Or, yoo can challenje sumwun else.
Submit a nominayshun for my Food Lady of the Yeer Award. I'm sending $1 for eech nominayshun to Libby Marie's mom for the vet bills.
If yer a member of FOS, we have a forum set up ware yoo can leeve memorial messijes for Libby Marie and her famly. GO HEER TO LEEVE A MESSIJE.

Farewell, Sweet Libby, we will miss yoo!

As always, anywun hoo wunts to is welcome to link heer or copy the info above for yer blog. (and let me know via the comments feeld of other things that are being done to help Libby's famly that others can pawtisipate in.) The link for this post is: http://www.skeezixthecat.com/scratchingpost/2006/12/farewell-libby.html

Bizzy Day .....

We were all vary bizzy today. Mr Tasty Face brot a big tree into the howse. Sadly, it's not pink. But thare's lots of boxes and stuff to git into. The best part of the day was that Mao got his pikchur taken for his boodwahr foto: BOY DID HE HATE THAT!!!!! He's uzhully good abowt pozing, but this time thare was just too much pink froo froo for him. Still, the Food Lady and Mr TF were viktorius in gitting one good shot that will fulfill the challinje. .... and then the pink robe will be on its way to KISMET THE BIG MAN CAT for his challinje!!!!! (I hope he duzn't pee on it!) Anyway, Mao will be posting his foto for Meezer Munday tomorrow! (BTW, I think he looks HOT!!)

In other nooz, it's bin a bizzy week for the Vishus Deer Nayberhood Watch in the FOS Groop on Catster. Many of us have bin alarmd at the prolifferayshun of lited deer skeletuns on peepuls lawns in the last week or 2. My frends Dutchess and Gordy have dun sum reeserch, and Dutchess reported thare findings this week:

Those skeletons of vishus deer you see outside your house are NOT able to skewer and eat you! I'm not sure exactly what new breed of vishus deer they are, but we have some across our yard too. 3 to be exact on ourneighbors lawn.
I have a theory- Our neighbor has an outside cat. I think the human may have put the skeletal vishus deer out as a warning to all the LIVE vishus deer that we have become familiar with to frighten them off! Since these skeletal vishus deer have been outside, my mom and I have not seen ANY vishus deer on our property or around the neighborhood AT ALL!!!
My original theory was to put fake vishus deer antlers on my baby brother, Gordy, so I could disguise him. He's young and VERY juicy and a prime catch for the vishus deer. The antlers would lead them to believe that he was a vishus deer himself and leave him (us) alone and leave the property since there was no reason to hunt here anymore ( a territory thing). I believe this to be incorrect, now that I have observed the skeletal deer some more. The vishus deer are afraid to become skeletal deer themselves and they stay away! Even our outdoor neighbor kitty sits near the skeletal vishus deer without any harm coming to him.
I WOULDN'T recommend trying this however- I still need to make many more observations and studies, but I think for the time being, you are safe, even outside in your moms arms.

As yoo can planely see, Dutchess's methudolujey is vary sownd. I think we shood all start waring vishus deer antlers!!!! Are thare any of yoo owt thare hoo have worn vishus deer antlers and bin eeten by vishus deer?

A new kyoot owtfit

This is my new kyoot owtfit. As yoo can planely see, it's nice and brite, to lift the spirits during the gray daze of winter. It's made of fleese so it's cozy and cumfy, and it has a nice deezine feechur -- it has a strip of velkrow all the way up the bak so it's reely eezy to put on and take off.

How to Join FOS

My best frend Ariel was asking how to join Frends of Skeezix (FOS), and I'm shur thare are more of yoo hoo'd like to join, so heer's how:

Join Catster. Caster is an online soshul netwerk JUST FOR CATS and it's FREE.
Go to the FOS site and join, or send me an emale and have me send yoo an invatayshun.

It's just that eezy!

Ariel is owr 200th member, and Rocky will point owt that the BEST part abowt FOS is its Vishus Deer Nayberhood Watch Groop wich is the best place on the planit to find owt abowt vishus deer sitings and how FOSers are deeling with this terribul thret.

And, new members git free FOS buttuns and stuff, wich yoo can see on Kimo and Sabi's blog!

Gess whut Mao's doing this weekend?

So, just between yoo and me, Mao's pink robe arrived today, so the infumus Boodwahr foto can be taken this weekend. Heer, he's gitting his "fitting." It fits! We're reddy to rok and role.

Last Chance to Gess my 600th Post!

Today is the last day to enter the "Gess when my 600th blog post will be publisht" kontest. Winner gits a morfing Skeezy mug. Go to the post and enter yer gess in the comments feeld as instruktid. If yoo've alreddy enterd and wunt to change yer gess, yoo can do so until the dedline at midnite tonite!

>> Submit yer gess NOW!

NOTE: DO NOT enter yer gess in the comments feeld of THIS post - it won't be cownted. Yoo have to go to the kontest post to enter.

Libby Marie is in my thots

Most of yoo know, but for those hoo don't, Libby Marie's sichuwayshun is vary vary grim. Pleeze drop by her blog and offer yer support and lite a candle for her and her famly during this vary diffikult time. We've known her for too short a time, and she's a dailey commenter on this blog and an enthooziastik FOSer. We luv her vary much and wish her the best.

Frootbat Friday

I'm the littul wite wun in the middul.

MORE Frootbats:
>> Luxor
>> Kaze
>> Dragonheart
>> Cheysuli
>> William

Thursday Thirteen: Edishun 11

UPDATE: I put the rong link on TT13: My TT13 for 14 December (Edishun 12) is HEER.

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Skeezy's Peepul Krissmiss Gift Giving Gide

As a publik serviss to the harreed peepul owt thare, I'm going to list 13 things that wood make good peepul gifts this Krissmiss that yoo mite not alreddy have thot of. I'm rekumending stuff that my Food Lady has exibittid speshul deelite in reecintly:

The New Yorker Cartoons' Rejection Collection: Kartoons that didn't make it into the magazeen becuz they were too deemented or riskay or politikly inkorrekt. The Food Lady and Mr TF have bin reeding this at bedtime, and they make vary lowd choking sownds and laff a lot and sqweel (the Food Lady sqweels, not Mr TF) wile thare doing it, so I think it must be good.
Anything frum the Best Frends Animul Sankchewary Store. Proceeds help the animuls and thare's a lot of grate stuff that yoo wood probly be buying anyway.

Sponser a Best Frends Animul Sankchewary Animul. Frum birds to barnyard buddeez, yoo can sponser a cat or other aniuml in abowt 4 minits, all online.

Uncle Oinker's Gummy Bacon
Crazy Cat Lady Action Figure Komplete with a mess o' cats.
The Book "Tails of Devotion". Peepul (sum fameus, sum not) deskribe the bond with thare pets. Proseeds frum the sales go to animul charuteez.
A Lexar Jump Drive. The Food Lady got one of these and duzn't know how she livd withowt it. Plugs into the USB thingie and lets yoo move massiv files frum one compyooter to anuther withowt having to burn to CD or sumthing. She keeps it on her keychain. Grate for the gajit geek on yer list.
A Blogging Cats Calendar. Help owt fellow cat bloggers thru sum ruff times with yer purchase, and give a grate kalinder to boot!
Mao & Rocky's Vishus Deer Repelunt. Mao made me put this on the list.
Life: A Journey Through Time. New photography book owt by the gratest naychur fotograffer EVER, Frans Lanting. A kalinder is also avaylubul.
Give the gift of YOO. Make yer own kalender. Zazzle offers a bunch of diffrint styles and opshuns, AND yoo can start on any munth yoo like. Qwality is exsillint! Tons of other produkts are avayabul as well.
Bake it/Can it/Brew it and slap yer own purrfeshunul label on it! The Food Lady alwayze makes homemade stuff at Krissmiss and puts these snazzy purrfesshunul kustum labels on them. In fakt, don't tell anywun, but sumtimes she steems the labels offa cheep wine and puts a fancy kustum label on it and givs thoze to the peepul in the famly hoo can't tell 2-buk-Chuck frum Opus 1.
The Werld's Grossest Cooking Tool EVER. Yoo have to see it to beeleeve it!

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I WON!

I won the Costumes and Shades Category in Catster's Werld's Coolest Cat Kontest! Sadly, I cannot call myself the werld's coolest cat becuz sumbuddy else wun Best in Show, but I wun some reely cool prizes and I'm a good solid runner up, and thare's always next yeer (as any of yoo hoo are Chicago Kubs fans shood know abowt)!!!! Maybe next yeer Mao can enter with his upcoming boodwahr foto waring my pink satin bathrobe!!!

AND, my geezer frend Rocky pulled off a win in the SLEEPER category!!!! WOO HOO! Congratyulayshuns, Rocky!!! (I gess milking pity votes is a winning stratijey). We are a vary happy howsehold this morning!!!!

THANK YOO to evrywun hoo voted for me and Rocky. We had sum vary stiff competishun and we appresheeyate yer support.

PRIZES:

A lot of yoo have asked whut me and Rocky wun.... well we BOTH wun the following:

One Year CatsterPlus Membership
ConAirPro deluxe trimmer (We're both gonna give Mao a lion cut!)
Scoop Free Automatic Cat litter system (Between my sqwerts and Rocky's hyooje pee briks, 2 of theeze will come in handy!)
Target Gift Card - $100 (Target sells lots of kyoot cat owtfits!)
100 Zealies (To give owt to all owr Catster frends!)

Fred 'n' Eddie

This is a pikchur of my cuzzins, Fred 'n' Eddie. Eddie's the oranje one. Thare both asleep heer. Beeleeve it or not, Fred and Eddie are frends. Eddie looks owt after Fred becuz Fred is vary vary vary old and decrepid and deff, and Eddie makes shur Fred duzn't fall into the pool or git into any trubble, and Eddie hunts down tee-bone stakes in the nayberhood and brings them home to Fred. Fred was dumpt neer my faverit Ant Joanne's howse becuz he was a geezer dawg. He's vary vary sweet and pathetik. Ant Joanne wunted me to put thare pikchur on my blog so they cood see themselves on the innernet:

LAST DAY TO VOTE!!!

Just a reminder that today is the last day to vote for me in Catster's Werld's Coolest Cat Contest.

Yoo need to be a Catster member to vote, and if yer not alreddy a member, heer are the reezins to join:

It's FREE!
It's FUN!
Yoo can join the "Frends of Skeezix (FOS)" Groop on Catster and keep up with vishus deer nooz in the groops "Vishus Deer Nayberhood Watch Groop."
It makes it eezy to keep with all my frends in the Frends of Skeezix groop wich has neerly 200 members!
As a member of FOS, yoo'll git free FOS buttuns and stuff.
Yoo can join "Luxor's Fan Club!"
Got a stroler? Join the Super Strolers Groop!
Lots of breed- and color-spesifik groops are avaylubul!
Uplode videeyos and fotos and stuff to share with yer Catster frends.
Yoo can VOTE FOR ME in the Werld's Coolest Cat Kontest!

So join today and VOTE FOR ME!

Wich of Santa's Vishus Ranedeer are Yoo?

I fownd this at my best frends' Finny and Buddy's blog -- it's a fun test! And it's scary how akyurit it is!

You Are Donner

The most loveable and sweet reindeer, you're also a total dork!

Why You're Naughty: You keep (accidentally) tripping the other reindeer while flying.

Why You're Nice: You're always smiling, even if you've fallen flat on your horns.

Which of Santa's Reindeer Are You?

Whut are they doing???

This morning, my big bruther Mao and Rocky were looking intently at sumthing, and kinda giggling in a weird way, so I wanderd over and say, "Hey, whatcha got thare... lemme see! lemme see!" and Mao sed sumthing abowt mishunareez, and he woodn't let me see becuz he sed I woodn't understand. And so I wated until they wint owtside and I wint and got the pikchur of the mishunareez, and yoo know whut? He's rite.... I reely don't unnerstand whut's going on or why Mao and Rocky were so fasinaytid with the foto. Do any of yoo know?

Daisy Mae and Rocky....

.... sittin' in a tree. K - I - S - S - I - N - G !!!!!!!!!!!

PINK Krissmiss Tree!

The Food Lady took this pikchur of a PINK FETHER Krissmiss tree that she saw win she and Mr TF wint to San Loois Obismul last munth. Is this not the most byootiful Krissmiss tree EVER??? Sadly, she did not buy it for me. Or maybe she just SED she didn't buy it for me, and she's gonna surprize me.... but if she was gonna surprize me, wood she show me a foto of it beforehand? Hmmmm......

My Newest Kyoot Owtfit

Heer is my newest kyoot owtfit. It is a pink argile swetter. Argile meens it has dimunds and lines in a pattern on it. I cood go golfing in this swetter if I knew whut golfing wuz.

Gess my 600th Post Kontest!

ENTREEZ ARE NOW CLOZED.

GOOD LUK, EVRYWUN!!!!

My 600th post is fast aproching. If yer gess is klosest to the date and time of my 600th post, yoo'll win this amazing "Skeezix the Bad Boy" mug. This isn't any ordnary mug, tho --- it's a morfing mug! Win it's cold, it's all black. Win yoo pore a hot bevrij into it, yoo git to see ME in my lether jakkit and shades. Pritty neet, huh??

TO ENTER
Evry cat can enter, even if thare is more than one livving at yer howse. Leeve yer gess with ALL of the following information in the comments feeld of this post.

NAME:
BLOG or CATSTER PROFILE URL:
Your Gess: DATE/TIME (PST):

DEDLINE:
Midnite (PST) Friday December 8th.

Welcome Dragonheart!

I wunted to take a minit to introdoose my new best frend, Dragonheart. Dragonheart is brand new to blogging, so add him to yer blogroll and stop by and say hello. He has frootbat ears just like me, but he has EVEN LESS HARE THAN ME!!! He also clames to be a Tuxedo like Rocky, but I have a hard time seeing that. Dragonheart is a Canadian kitty livving in Jerminey. I don't know if they git sik more offin thare becuz of the jerms, or whut. I'll have to do sum reeserch. And, becuz he duzn't have any hare, he gits to ware swetters --- and he looks reel nice in them, too!

I reely like Dragonheart, and I know yoo will, too! VIZIT HIS BLOG NOW!

Stuff fer Sale

Sum of yoo have asked if I have Skeezix the Cat Christmas stuff avaylubul for perchiss. I do. Heer are the hot new items:

Mao & Skeezix Christmas Card

Mao & Skeezix Christmas Stamp

Skeezix the Elf Christmas Stamp

Skeezix the Elf Christmas Card

More coming.... stay toond!

Me and my big bruther Mao

Heer's me and my big bruther Mao, relaxing on the big compyooter teevee in the office. I've got my snuggly pink swetter on. It's got a high nekline so I stay reelly warm win I'm waring it.

Yesturday was eventful. Me and my big bruther Mao got owr pikchurs taken for the Krissmiss cards. We got to ware Santa hats, and I got a speshul red and wite owtfit to ware! The Food Lady even took a pikchur of that psyko stray cat Tripper waring a Santa hat. He is reely becoming a big man cat --- he's HYOOJE and he keeps gayning wate. I think him and Kismet cood have fun playing football together. Sumtimes I reely wish I was a big man cat, too, but then I remember that if I started to git reel big, I woodn't fit into any of my kyoot owtfits anymore.

WARE TO GIT THE PINK SWETTER:
I've had a cuppul of yoo ask ware I got my snuggly pink swetter. I got mine as a berthday gift, but heer's ware yoo can buy one: http://tinyurl.com/ybmnyu.

Boodwahr Foto

Heer I am, relaxing in bed in my cumpfy yet stilish pink bathrobe. It's lined with soft terrycloth, and the owtside is byootiful pink satin with fether trim. As yoo can planely see, it sets off my pink noze and pink ears nicely. This is whut they call a boodwahr foto. That's win the fotograffer makes the lite nice and soft, and I have to sit in a poze deezined to give other cats urjes. Do any of yoo git urjes looking at this boodwahr foto?

If yer intristed in asking Santa for a Pink Satin Bath Robe of yer vary own, heer's ware yoo can buy it.

I may die toonite.

My sensitiv noze may ixplode frum a vary bad smell and it kood be faytul. A skunk evidently got kornerd on the frunt porch toonite and let loose with a klowd of stink partikuls that are a sqwillyun times werse than my wersest poop problim, and the stink partikuls came in the howse, and it's so strong it smells like a skunk got elektrokyooted. Rocky and Trip the psyko stray cat were owtside win it happend, but they do not appeer to have bin involvd. I do not beeleeve the smell will go away in my lifetime.

NEW CONTEST: Food Lady/Dude of the Yeer Award

Nominayshuns are now being aksepted for the 1st annual Skeezix the Cat's Food Lady/Food Dude of the Yeer Award.

Are yer peepul TOPS in yer eyes? Heer's yer chanse to thank them! This is the flip side of the Tails of Devoshun Kontest.

GRAND PRIZE

A "Food Lady/Food Dude of the Yeer Award" Trofeey
$50 Amazon Gift Sertifikit
Sponsership of a Best Frends Cat in yoo or yer Food Lady/Dude's name
more TBA

FINULIST'S PRIZES

Eech of the five finulists will git a prize, I just haven't deesided whut, yet.

WILDCARD PRIZE
One name will be chozin at randum frum the entreys that are not finulists and will reeseeve:

Sponsership of a Best Frends Cat in yoo or yer Food Lady/Dude's name
more TBA

YOOL HELP OWT A FREND IN NEED BY ENTERING

And, for evry entry in the kontest (up to a max of 50 entreeez), I will donate $1 eech to Brandi, Oreo, and Libby Marie. Brandi's mom is owt of werk, Oreo's Mom has huge peepul-vet bills and Oreo is trying to help owt, and Libby Marie has big vet bills. So, just by entering yoo can help owt a cat in need! If thare are 50 entreez, Brandi, Oreo and Libby Marie will EECH git $50.

ROOLZ

It can be as long or short as yoo like. Any format -- inclooding a storey, poem, fotos, videeyos, lists, rap song.
To submit a nominayshun, yoo must be a cat with a blog (that has posts prior to 1 Dec 2006) OR a Catster profile. (Bin meening to start a blog or join Catster? Now's the time! And, both Blogger and Catster are FREE.)
Evry cat hoo submits a nominayshun gits one extra vote, to be posted in the comments feeld of the nominayshun.
I can change the roolz anytime I wunt becuz it's my kontest.

WARE TO PUT YER ENTREEZ
at foodladyaward.blogspot.com. Sine in to blogger using username: frendofskeezix and pw: skeezix.

DEDLINE FOR ENTREEZ:
December 17th at 11:59pm

VOTING:
December 18th - 24th (Ballut will be taken down win the Food Lady and Mr TF git home frum midnite Mass arownd 2:30 am on 12/25.)

The top five vote-getters will become finulists, and the winner will be chozen frum the finulists by a committee konsisting of Skeezix the Cat, Mao, Rocky the Gutter Cat and Trip the psyko stray cat.

WINNER WILL BE ANNOWNST on Krismiss Day.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

Freeqwintly Askt Qweschuns

Q: Thare are a bunch of cats in owr famly. Can we eech submit seprit nominayshuns for the same Food Lady/Food Dude?
A: The same persun can only be nominayted once in a singul entrey. So, in that singul entry, eech cat can explane why s/he thinks thare food lady/food dude shood win.

Q. Can I only nominate MY persun, or can I nominate sumwun else?
A. Yoo can nominate anywun yoo like. For ixzampul, Grr cood nominate KC's mom for taking such good care of KC after she got so sik frum her ladygardenectomy, and Midnight mite nominate Princess Zippy's mom for selling a car to pay for Zippy's vet bills. And Cocoa cood nominate thare own Food Lady.

Q. My persun is the best food lady EVER, but she hasn't done anything heroic like saving me frum a berning bilding or donayting a kidney to me or anything. Shood I even bother nominayting her?
A. Tell yer story, no matter how big or small. I'm shur s/he'd love reeding it. Remember --- I'll donate $1 eech to Brandi, Oreo and Libby Marie for eech entry.

Q. Can anybuddy submit a nominayshun?
A. Only cats hoo have blogs with posts prior to 1 December 2006, OR Catster profiles may enter nominayshuns.

Q. Can anybuddy vote?
A. Anywun with a valid emale adress can vote. For cat households hoo share an emale adress, yoo can emale yer votes to me and I'll enter them manyully.

Q. My Food Lady is kind of a privit persun. Do I have to tell evrybuddy whut her name is?
A. Nope. I don't even know my Food Lady's name, wich is why I call her the Food Lady.

Frootbat Friday

Sumtimes, beefore I git evikted frum the peepul bedroom, Mr TF lets me snuggul with him. This is one of thoze times.
Other Friday Frootbats:
>> Luxor
>> Kaze
>> Dragonheart